(Untitled Michael)

Aaaaaand another song :) I am so happy with Michael for now, but the other day I was in a melancholy mood, and I was wondering what would happen when we broke up. And it was so sad I started a song about it. It doesn't have a chorus or name yet. I had a chorus, but I decided that it would better fit another song (which I will write shortly while I feel inspired).


(UNTITLED MICHAEL)

(Vs. 1)
I've always worried about
Being on the wrong side of a breakup,
Singing my sad songs,
Wishing we could make up.
But I never imagined what I could do:
That I'd have enough power to hurt you.

(Vs. 2)
I gave you everything you'd wanted,
Now I feel I no more than taunted you,
Holding what you felt you could never have,
Only to break your heart and take it back.

(Vs. 3)
I had a wonderful childhood,Easy even.
Everything I needed, with everyone who loved me.
You were uncared for, unloved,
Left with no self-esteem and such a need.
Was I really right to try to help you?
Or did I only break you beyond repair?

(Middle Thing)
I tamed the beast, I broke you down
So I could get inside.
But when I left, I cut a hole
In your heart, stinging wide.
But I hope, someday, you can forgive me
For being the monster I turned out to be.
I hope someday you'll see the sun,
The light and joy of us, even though I wasn't the one.



And just because the other chorus was awesome, even though it's gonna go with another song, here it is:

(Chorus)
Why do I try? I always fail.
Now everyone will stand and cry "Hail",
"Hail to Queen of Broken Hearts, of Shattered Dreams,
Of the ones torn at the seams
By those who didn't understand.
Hail to the subject-less,
The Loneliest in All the Land."

What have I done?




UPDATE: Okay it is August 18th, 2011, almost exactly 8 months since Michael and I started dating. We've been dating on and off, a pretty rocky (though incredibly amazing, if I do say so) relationship. Today (after a very disillusioning conversation) he sent me a text saying:

I hate you. I hate you so much. How dare you just prance into my life and break me? ("I'd never imagined what I could do, that I'd have enough power to hurt you") ...How dare you leave me bleeding and cold, to preserve your pure thoughts. But at the same time, I adore you because you have brought feelings to this cold fighter. ("I tamed the beast, I broke you down so I could get inside.") You gave me light, but snatched it away just as fast as you came. ("I gave you everything you'd wanted,now I feel I no more than taunted you, holding what you felt you could never have,only to break your heart and take it back.") ...I have also learned that it's best for me not to come to you for help, as it always winds up in more bleeding."

Among the texts were also these:
"I have been down roads you have nightmares about, seen things you only see in movies..." (You were uncared for, unloved, left with no self-esteem and such a need)

"When I tear my heart open and bleed for you..." "Laying here alone and bleeding" ("But when I left, I cut a hole in your heart, stinging wide.")



Michael, I am sorry for what I've done to you. Truly I am. And if you ever see this, don't worry. No one else will. This is a private blog, and only those who I invite can see what's on here. So no one will see the parallels between your message and mine, but you and me. I'm sorry, for everything. <3